home is where my parents live or why Johnny Knoxville is an american hero

i'm home. right now i'm sitting in my bed after just eating an Ippolito's calzone. for all my Atl readers you should know what that means, for all my Liberty readers you have no idea the goodness that is ippolitos, probably because you've never heard of it. but really you should have eaten it by now so i dont pity you...pretend you are a tribesman in the middle of some third world country and you've never heard of Jesus, if you die, will you go to hell? see, in the same way, since you don't know about ippolito's you really arent sure about your eternal security anymore.

that really makes no sense.

tonight as i ate my Ippolito's calzone and watched tv i was reminded of someone whom i would love to meet. the Jackass himself, Johnny Knoxville. i think if i actually ever met him i would look something like this:

i would keep that face until spoken to, then i would answer in one word to whatever he asked, then i would resume making that face. i would repeat this process however many times is necessary until he understands how moved i am to be by him. i really have more respect for that man than he deserves. he doesnt really do anything. he's just the complete man. in the movie Jackass 2 he proved to me that he is the ideal man, i think that Adam from the Bible probably was alot like him. 

i have a theory (and this is the serious, concerned part of this blog) that the government should stop storing information and other stuff in computers. because no matter how advanced the computers get, James Bond villains will always find a way to hack into them, seriously, all you need is a nerdy guy who can type really fast to sit down at the computer for awhile and just go nuts. he doesnt even have to be typing anything important. just give him that black screen with the green writing and let him go to town and you'll be able to see that the government was responsible for 9/11 in 1 minute tops. its even better if he tells you it takes an hour to crack the program and you tell him, "you've got 1 minute or i'm going to crack you." i promise you he'll figure it out in 58 seconds. anyways, they should stop storing it in these computers and start telling Johnny Knoxville everything they know. every secret, every bit of information. can anyone argue with this? i mean really, imagine watching an hour long episode of 24 with Jack Bauer trying to torture Johnny Knoxville. it would be as futile as a tug of war match between Hulk Hogan and Rosie O'Donnell. all that to say:

its good to be home.